I used to work as a primary school teacher in a
university in Manila. I had the normal life. I wake up early enough to be in
school; I go home after office hours,
though sometimes I had to work overtime – but for free – well that’s a
teacher’s life – working beyond your paid hours unpaid for the sake of your
students and school. Anyways, that was the life I had until last academic year.
I decided to take the privilege of regular employees
- a one-year leave from the institution. I did it for one purpose. I planned to
go abroad – to study – and of course to work. I expected for a better life. I
planned not to return, and if I do, it is just for a graceful exit. Sydney,
this is the place where I chose to be.
July of 2013, I left and went to Sydney with the plans
I had. I had the mix of emotions. I am excited, definitely, yet anxious for it
was not clear to me how my life would turn out when I get there. So, I got
there. My first week was the adjustment
period. I couldn't eat well. I even tried to cook for myself to be able to eat,
but it didn't work. Afterwards, the next few weeks were better. I started
working on my plans. I met people who could help me out. I went to places where
I need to ask and accomplish all paper documents, and so on. I went out on
weekends and visited places as a tourist, too. Everything was turning well; it
was all great, until one nightmare came.
One Friday morning, on my fourth week in the city, I
was blessed with people who generously offered me some help for me to push
through with my plans. I jumped out of joy, finally I’m getting there. I called
the immigration to finalize everything. Unexpectedly, I didn't get the answers
that I need. My world fell apart after hearing those words that I had to go
back to my country before I could finally work on my plans. I have already invested everything I had for
that trip, and nothing is left for me to go back to square one. I caught myself
crying out loud, but no words ever spoken. I am not sure for how long I was at
that state that morning, but surely it was one of the worst feelings I had in
my life.
That same day, I went to the airline office and
decided to get my ticket to fly back home the following week. I was full of
shame to myself. I didn't know exactly how I would face the people around me.
These are the people who hoped, dreamed, and expected with me in this journey. I consider this event as one of those darkest
days in my life. I wanted to find the light, to get up and move on. It took me
numerous crying nights to get over. I was uneasy. I thought I was going crazy.
But, I had to pretend I am alright. I had to think over. I need to find out
where I went wrong. And, I figured it out.
As what people say, IF YOU FAIL TO PLAN, YOU PLAN TO FAIL. I didn't say that I didn't plan at all. In fact, I had all the plans
listed. But I didn't execute them well. I was overwhelmed with it that I forgot
to review every detail that I need to consider. My plans were not enough. I ended
up with no accomplishment – just failure. Therefore, this fate of mine made me
realize how big the word PLANNING is. We may always claim that we have planned
everything and that we are ready. But, in planning, you must also prepare
yourself to every possible down falls. Plan A, plan B, plan C – these plans
will never be enough. Why not make your plans from A to Z?
Friends wonder where this screen name comes from. Well, only
my family actually know why since it was them who baptized me with it. However,
I told myself, why not share the history behind it? I find it funny and interesting,
anyway.